Wycombe Match Off due to Snow (white)

Southend United's match this Saturday against Wycombe has been postponed due to snow, but not your usual snow.

The League Two fixture clashed with referee Andy Woolmer's panto commitments in his home town of Northampton. The vertically challenged whistle-blower was due to appear as Grumpy in the Saturday matinee performance of Snow White the same time as the Shrimpers took on the Chairboys. For the Napoleon complex suffering Woolmer, who has over the years made his contempt of football of football clear, there was only ever going to be one winner and the Roots Hall clashed was shelved.

A Southend United spokesman thought, but dared not say for fear of being booked for dissent: "this is the best Christmas present we could have wished for (other than a new stadium from Father Sainsburys). Hopefully we'll get a full-size referee allocated to us for the re-arranged fixture."

Southend United remain unbeaten in the league at Roots Hall since mid-October.

Sturrock to shout at Mohsni over red card

Southend boss Paul Sturrock is all set for a showdown with fiery defender Bilel Mohsni. The former Plymouth and Swindon manager is understood to be fuming at his centre-half's sending-off in last night's JPT game.

In their forthcoming meeting Sturrock is expected to pull no punches - much like Bilel did against Barnet - and to give the French defender the full hair-dryer treatment as he lectures him on how unprofessional it is to lose your temper.

Said a source close to the club: "I'm not selling up".

SOUTHEND UNITED ACCUSED OF FIXING RESULTS

The world of Southend United was plunged into CONTROVERSY once more when the club was accused of FIXING RESULTS.

The games in question are believed to be last Saturday's home game and the previous week's encounter at Northampton.

A Southend Afternoon Echo exclusive investigation can now EXCLUSIVELY reveal that these results were not a 3-2 defeat to Morecambe (or even Morecombe, who Craig Easton believed he was playing against) and a 2-1 loss at Northampton as previously believed.

Instead the Southend Afternoon Echo can WORLD EXCLUSIVELY report that "The Blues are currently unbeaten in the last three League games".

The explosive e-mail

These EXPLOSIVE claims came in an e-mail received by the Southend Afternoon Echo at 5:59 PM on 21 September 2010 from the club amusingly entitled EAST ON....AQUA AEROBICS, SPEEDOS AND GOLF! After club captain Craig Easton reveals about how "GUTTED" everyone was at the result against "Morecombe" (sic), the e-mail refers to an article entitled HOSPITALITY OFFER where this outrageous 3 match unbeaten claim is made - a claim that is likely to either shock football to it's very core or be as shocking as Barry Corr.

In DAMNING footage obtained by the Southend Afternoon Echo Sportsdesk, the Roots Hall scoreboard is CLEARLY shown failing to record Morecambe's (or possibly Morecombe's) THREE goals as it does it's best to persuade shocked on-lookers that both teams were firing blanks.


Fans wanting to book their Executive Suite at this very special rate are then urged to call Junior Garrod on 01702 304128 or alternatively email your enquiry to junior.garrod@southend-united.co.uk

Southend to play in stilettos

The Southend Afternoon Echo Sportsdesk can exclusively reveal that Southend United will be playing against Port Vale in stilettos. The revelation follows the success of the white socks that were introduced to give the team a more authentic "Essex look".

Now the club are taking it one stage further by combining it with stilettos. As boss Paul Sturrock explained*: "the stiletto is even more associated with Essex than white socks, plus they give more grip than studded boots."

"As Anthony Grant seems to have trouble standing up in boots, we're hoping he can stop bruising himself when he falls to the floor every time he's tackled, by wearing stilettos.

The 6 inch heels should give more purchase than the usual studs he wears, and will make tackling more interesting. I'm looking forward to it."

The club is also apparently looking at playing around a couple of Alan McCormack's old discarded handbags.



* Please note the Southend Echo Sportsdesk accepts no liability over the accuracy of any Paul Sturrock's statements. To be honest we might as well make it all up, because we haven't got a clue what he's saying either, but he doesn't half say it in a lovely Scottish accent.

Mystery solved at Wembley

So that is what Zoltan Liptak looks like.

Club have nothing better to do than sit around and read Shrimperzone

In dramatic news today, it emerged that the club has, like most of us, nothing* better to do with our time than sit around and read SZ and/or twitter.

Within 3 hours of the Southend Afternoon Echo Sportsdesk breaking the exclusive story about squad numbers (following a tip-off on leading football web-site Shrimperzone), the club was forced to issue a climatic backdown and deny the intrepid Phil Christopers' scoop by printing the actual squad numbers.

The Southend Afternoon Echo Sportsdesk would like to apologise to all Southend fans who rushed to the club shop to have Blair Sturrock "12" printed on their shirts.



*Other than signing 3 players, but the Barker and Simpson loan deals were done last week and I still have no idea who Adam Bouzid is.

Southend set to announce squad numbers

With the transfer embargo just hours/days/months away from being lifted ahead of the new season, Southend United are set to announce the new squad numbers for the 2010/2011 season.

With only one player remaining from 12 months ago, it's set to be all change with every number except for 7 up for grabs. And whilst some of the key numbers have still - according to the club's official website - to be assigned, it seems that the likes of Sean Clohessy, Peter Gilbert, Craig Easton, Barry Corr and Sofiene Zaaboub have all already been handed numbers.

Of those given numbers, the biggest story is the coveted number 12 shirt. The Blue Voice were believed to be keen on becoming the official 12th man, but instead the 12 shirt appears to have been handed to the manager's son, the oddly named Blair Sturrock.

An unnamed, made-up, club spokesman explained the decision: "The Blue Voice were keen to be the 12th man and the club were keen for the number 12 shirt to represent the club's support. We're confident that the reception that will greet Blair - who's already been written off as useless by many and only signed because of who his father is - when he finally makes his Southend debut, will achieve just that."

"I mean what says loyal supporters better than booing a player before he's even kicked a ball for us? So whenever I hear 'coming on for Southend United, number 12 Blair Sturrock, boooooo' I will instantly think of the fans."

Ron elected to League Board

Southend Chairman Ron Martin has been elected to the Football League Board.

Whilst the move will come as a shock to many who will question the wisdom of appointing a man whose club may be wound up before the season, the Southend Afternoon Echo has learnt there were good reasons behind Ron Martin's appointment.

With no London clubs in the division (except Barnet, and if you've ever tried to get there on the Northern Line you'll know they are hardly London) Southend, who will be in town anyway for their weekly appointment at the debtors' section of the High Court, were the natural choice.

The move also negates any concerns over claiming back SUFC's share of Board Members 'travel expenses.

It is unknown whether Mr Martin put himself forward for this prestigious role, or whether he was nominated in his absence when no-one else wanted to do it and someone had the bright idea of giving the role to the bloke who was still on holiday.

Stalk the Blues Day big success/failure

The annual Stalk The Blues day was a tremendous success/ failure with fans from across the county delighted/ furious at the free event hosted at Boots and LacesGarons Park.

Southend fans were United in congratulating/condemning the club for hosting for an event described as "one of the best ones yet"/"a waste of everyone's time" with those delighted/furious supporters vowing to come back next year/get a flag and protest.

The absence of manager Paul Sturrock/the approachability of the squad who gave up their Sunday afternoon to pose for autographs and sign photos with the fans, was commented by many fans on sites such as Shrimperzone.

As kids frolicked in the summer sun, joyfully indulging in the myriad of activities put on by the club, adults were left to rue the lack of a bouncy castle to satisfy them. When asked, Southend fans were quick to congratulate the commercial department for putting on such an enjoyable event and the players for being so cheerful/blame Ron Martin and Billy Jennings for the event not sating their stalking demands and the absence of a bar.

Southend sign "new McCormack"

Southend moved quickly to replace the Tenerife Charlton Reserves bound Alan McCormack when the League Two club announced that Barry Corr had signed a pre-contract agreement.

Corr,who is Irish and has an abysmal disciplinary record, is seen as a like for like replacement for the departed McCormack. Whilst Corr is allegedly a forward rather than a midfielder, he shares with his compatriot a similarly dire shooting record, having netted a mere three times last season. Beleagured residents of Shakespeare Drive reacted with dismay at the prospect, although to be fair it is not yet known whether the former musician will be as wayward.

Fans at McCormack's old club, Mayhem, treated the news with cautious optimism and hoped that the signing was evidence that Southend United was indeed on an upward spiral.

Dave Smith II

As Southend fans attempt to digest news of the sacking of legendary manager Steve Tilson, rumours were mounting regarding his replacement.

As mooted in the Southend Afternoon Echo back in March*, chairman Ron Martin, looks set to appoint a Scottish former Plymouth and Dundee (they are the same as Dundee United, right?) manager in an attempt to turn around the woes.

Southend have had great success with Scottish Plymouth managers, with Bob Jack and Dave Smith both having also managed Plymouth. With Dave Webb, having also cut his managerial teeth in the South West at Torquay, the area is clearly a hot-bed for producing managerial talent, but whoever is in the Roots Hall hot-seat looks like having their work cut-out.


*When we said Dave Smith, we meant Paul Sturrock and when we said assistant manager we clearly meant manager.

Bin Martin: Ron issues Bin Laden style video tape

A tape said to be from the bunker of Martin Dawn chairman, Ron Martin, has been aired on www.southendunited.co.uk, a web-site with known links to Martin Dawn.

Directly addressing supporters losing the faith, the tape is seen by analysts as a direct response to rumours that have been circulating for months that the club was as good as dead. In it Martin offers words of hope and vows to continue the struggle.

The authenticity (of his answers) remains unverified.

Martin, whose health has been in question, has seemingly been laying low of late, reportedly hiding from creditors who seek him high and low. It is believed that he is hiding with his head in the sand.

World Cup Official Sponsors Controversy Latest

FIFA's crackdown on non-official sponsors and ambush marketing took a further twist when it was revealed that no players featuring in adverts for rivals of official matchball sponsor Adidas, would be allowed to participate in the World Cup quarter-finals.

The controversy follows hot on the heels of RobbieEarle-gate, which saw 30 Dutch models arrested for the heinous crime of wearing unofficial merchandising.

The clampdown is a blow for Nike, whose self-indulgent ad features the likes of Rooney (England), Ronaldo (Portugal), Cannavaro (Italy), Ronaldinho (Brazil) and Ribery (France).




With only Brazil bowing to FIFA's requirements and leaving out Ronaldinho, it meant a quarter-final stage bereft of most of Europe's top guns - and Portugal.

Under FIFA's wide ranging powers, Roger Federer was also prevented from progressing past the quarter-finals at Wimbledon, because it is on at the same time as the World Cup.

McCormack: "Disgraceful"

Disgraceful: that was the damning verdict handed out on departed midfielder Alan "first name on the team sheet" McCormack's performances over the last couple of seasons.

In an exclusive interview McCormack revealed that he's been on performance-related pay for the past 6 months. Whilst most League One footballers could expect to take home around two grand a week, McCormack revealed that due to his lacklustre performances in central midfield that led to relegation for the South Essex side, he's been eligible for just two win bonuses in the past 6 months.

It's believed that the former Orient loanee, has received only five goal bonuses in the last two seasons (and even those were mainly thanks to some generous deflections), despite regularly peppering the flats behind the South Bank.

McCormack, who made it clear that he didn't want to slag off his former club, then went onto slag off his former club, the referee and most of his former team-mates.

A spokesman for his former club, Mayhem, declined to comment.

Ron Martin kneecapped over debts

Southend Chairman Ron Martin was yesterday forced to issue a statement in response to growing rumours circulating around South East Essex.

The news emerged after Martin, 57, admitted providing a statement at Rayleigh Police Station following what he described as an "incident".

During the statement Martin confirmed that he had operations on both knees during the last month, for reasons that were described as "necessary as a direct result" of his "commitment to sport over many years".

This is believed to be a thinly veiled reference to his financial commitments in Southend United over the last 12 years.

Whilst Martin has been reluctant to comment on the League Two club's financial difficulties, it has been common knowledge that the club has been in a precarious financial situation. Faced with not one, but two winding up orders over the last season, Chairman Martin was forced to arrange some desperate last minute loans (and we're not just talking about Roy O'Donovan and Jabo Ibhere, although their loan performances were most certainly desperate). It would appear that one of the club's creditors may have taken action into their own hands - and Ron Martin's knees.


WHO MIGHT WANT TO KNEECAP RON MARTIN? - YOU DECIDE!

A - Jamie Oliver, the fat-lipped face of Sainsburys, a major creditor of the club.

B - A disgruntled unpaid former player, such as Alan McCormack.

C - Trevor Bashford of the Trust, whose £60,000 loan remains unpaid.

D - His missus.


Get well soon Ron.

Wembley Pitch Latest

As the football season draws (or in Southend's case presumably just loses) to an end, the hot topic of conversation on everyone's lips is about the state of the Wembley pitch.

The pitch came under severe criticism during last month's FA Cup final.

Managers and pundits were united in their condemnation of the playing surface. "Some teams play all season on pitches resembling beaches, and then come cup final teams are expected to play on a surface where there is grass and where centre-halves won't fall over to gift them incredibly soft goals" said one player, who was only willing to be identified as Adam from Southend. "Fortunately Colchester aren't ever likely to get to a cup final - I mean a proper one, where they'd maybe have to beat their local rivals in the semi-finals, not some crappy non-league one like the FA Vase - but the point still stands, or at least it would try and stand before slipping over and gifting the opposition an undeserved goal."

Wembley bosses were meanwhile trying to reassure spectators and media alike that everything is being done to improve the quality of the pitch.

"We tried to get a massive, stinking pile of manure on the pitch on Sunday" a Wembley official confirmed, "but Rotherham wouldn't co-operate. Apparently they'd have brought him on as sub, but they needed to score and he wasn't going to be much help at that. It's a shame, because he was genuinely the biggest load of s**t I've ever seen."

Crawford hailed as new Fitzpatrick

Southend youngster Harry Crawford was tonight hailed as the new Trevor Fitzpatrick following the shock revelation that he's been called up to Ireland's under 18 squad.

The young forward who has banged in no goals in five appearances has received the call to follow in the illustrious footsteps of Trevor Fitzpatrick. It is thought he qualifies for Ireland through having ginger hair.

Replacement for Barnard found at last

In a 2010 of near unremitting woe, there have been few bright spots for Southend United fans. One of those exceptions however appears to be the form of Scott Spencer.

The young forward signed from Rochdale appears to be the perfect replacement for departed goal-scoring superstar hero, Lee Barnard. Spencer has banged in a goal every 128 minutes.

That's the type of goalscoring form that could soon see him dubbed as the new Lee Barnard.

And the similarities don't end there. Spencer, like Barnard, joined in the January transfer window and has Premiership pedigree, courtesy of his time at Everton. Barnard was of course on Spurs' books prior to his move to Roots Hall where he enjoyed (or endured) an injury hit 18 months before blossoming in the final 6 months of his contract year and leaving on a knock-down fee.

So Spencer, who has only once managed to complete 90 minutes since joining in the transfer window, can officially be crowned the poor man's Barnard (and boy, are Southend poor at the moment, both off and on the pitch) when injury today ruled him out for the rest of the season.

Club act to ensure positive approach

The club today made another decisive step towards maintaining an UPWARD SPIRAL and having a POSITIVE APPROACH with an announcement sent to fans on their mailing list.

This news follows the sacking earlier this month of popular assistant Paul Brush because of perceived negativity. In his justification of the move, Chairman Ron Martin claimed he wanted to bring about a fresh outlook to the struggling League One side. The sacking of Brush was followed by the hiring of legendary manager Dave Webb, a move that was condemned by some as cosmetic, but one which did bring about a revival in fortunes as Essex's finest went on a three match unbeaten run, including their first win of 2010.

However in the aftermath of Saturday's devastating defeat at Bristol Rovers, the club moved quickly to emphasis how much worse things could be, by promoting tickets to hear Alvin Martin talk about football. The former Hamster scum is the last manager to have relegated Southend from this division. Under Martin's mismanagement the club slid from the third tier of English football to the verge of the conference - a depth the Blues are proud to have never sunk as low as, unlike their inbred neighbours.

The relief that the inept Scouser Scummer is no longer in charge is likely to be just the boost Southend need ahead of their do or die Easter weekend meetings, as the Blues seek to come back from the dead in a manner not seen since Nicky Bailey died of shame after being tapped in the chest by JFC. For as bad as things may appear at Roots Hall at the moment, at least we haven't still got Alvin Martin in charge.

Southend to appoint legend as assistant

SOUTHEND United are set to react to yet another devastating away defeat by appointing a legendary former manager as assistant to manager Steve Tilson.

The Southend Afternoon Echo Sportsdesk understands that chairman Ron Martin will appoint the former Southend and Torquay manager as assistant manager on Tuesday as he seeks to stave off relegation, an outcome he described as "fatal".

It is hoped that the former full-back will be the man to shore up United's shaky defence that has been leaking goals at an alarming rate and led to assistant manager, Paul Brush being sacked.

When Southend last slipped to an away defeat and into the relegation zone, chairman Ron Martin pulled the trigger and sacked Tilson's long term assistant, Brush. Martin, who promised Tilson would get to choose his own number two, was quick to appoint the sexagenarian Dave Webb as Tilson's assistant until the end of the season, despite Webb having been out of football for some time.

The legendary Webb's return, for no less than his fifth stint, provided a short term boost to the struggling League One side, who drew two and won one of their next three games. However the Webb effect appears to have worn off as the team surrendered an early two goal lead at Bristol Rovers and slumped to a 4-3 defeat.

Now Martin is hoping to capture lightning in a bottle twice - and for Southend to win twice in 2010 - by appointing the septuagenarian Dave Smith as assistant assistant manager.

It is hoped that the dream team of the three most successful managers in Southend United's history will save Southend, or at the very least placate fans. Chairman Martin though refused to be drawn on speculation that such appointments were gimmicks to cover over the fact that the club is subject to a transfer embargo and are unable to bring in any new signings and therefore have to make do with populist appointments of pensioners who have been out of football for years. However a source, who did not wish to be named, revealed that plans to attract the legendary Bob Jack back had to be dropped once Ron Martin saw the price mediums were charging these days.

Breaking News: Assistant Manager Sacked!!!!

'Drastic times call for drastic measures' appears to be the message coming out of the chairman's office at Roots Hall.

With the spectre of relegation looming over the South East Essex club, the Southend United Chairman took the highly unusual step of sacking not the manager, but rather his experienced assistant. The move has caught many by surprise in Southend, who have been struggling for much of this year without seemingly any concern from up high.

However another away defeat on Saturday - the team has yet to pick up a point on the road this calendar year - appears to be the final straw for the assistant, if not the manager. The team now lies firmly ensconced in the relegation zone and the historic ground-breaking success of six years earlier seemingly set to unravel.

Relegation is likely to be financially disastrous for the club, and if the chairman - who despite overseeing consecutive promotions and second tier football remain deeply unpopular - couldn't afford to sack a manager who remains popular from his playing days, he couldn't afford  not to take any action either.


So with his hands financially tied - although many would suggest by his own doing - Chairman Vic Jobson had nowhere else to turn but to sack Ronnie Whelan's assistant manager, Theo Foley in an attempt to break out of the downward spiral that threatens to send the club to the bottom of the bottom tier of the Football League and a depression that could last a generation.

Charlton star brands Southend boss a 'total disgrace'

Charlton captain Nicky Bailey has called his old Southend boss Steve Tilson "a total disgrace".
 
The Addicks triumphed 2-1 at Southend on Friday night with an injury-time winner to keep alive their automatic promotion hopes.

But the Shrimpers were reduced to 10 men when Jean Francois Christophe was sent off after Bailey went down clutching his head in the 25th minute after clashing with Christophe in the 22nd minute of the League One clash.

And midfielder Bailey, 25, who quit Southend for The Valley in August 2008, has been infuriated by claims by Tilson he feigned injury.

"I find Steve Tilson's comments quite laughable," slammed Bailey in a rant to the Southend Afternoon Echo Sportsdesk.

"Cheating is not a word that I have ever been associated with" said the Charlton man who was booked eleven times and sent off once during his 12 months at Roots Hall.

"Most managers go up to players after a game and say well done - even if they do not want to.

"But this is the same man who proposes new contracts by scribbling some figures on pieces of paper the size of a travel card or a post-it note when my salary demands would have filled a sheet of A4."

"To call me a cheat from 25 yards away at full-time is a total disgrace: that's closer to me than Jean Francois Christophe's fist ever got. Tilson should keep his distance, if ever gets that close to me again I shall have no alternative but to throw myself to the ground several minutes later, clutching my head and pretending I've been shot."

Will selling star striker hurt Southend's chances of staying up?

Southend chairman Ron Martin is coming under increasing pressure not to sell the relegation-threatened side's want-away leading scorer.

A number of bigger clubs are thought to be sniffing around the 24 year old Essex based forward whose goals have made him one of the hottest properties in the January window. With the striker making his desire to move on from his local team known and with his valuation being only likely to drop before the summer chairman Ron Martin must be sorely tempted to sell high.

However whilst many fans concede that their top asset's value has never been higher, supporters argue that selling during the January window would condemn the club to relegation. Fans claim the highly sought-after hot-shot's goals will fire the Blues to safety and that those goals will be worth more than any transfer fee received.

Those protestations are likely to be all the louder if Southend were to cash in and that striker was to finally get off the mark for his new club in his sixth appearance.

Freddy Eastwood is currently Southend's leading goalscorer with 13 goals.


From our January 2007 archive.  

Freddy Eastwood was not sold that transfer window, but he only managed a further three goals that season and Southend were relegated. Whilst Eastwood was sold that summer, it was for less than he was being valued at during January and the Essex side proceeded to struggle financially.

Hiatus Appeal Latest

Most of you will already be aware of the news of the hiatus in wages in January that has shocked the world.

News spread quickly, much of it by modern social networking sites, such as Alan McCormack's facebook account, whilst others will have only found out later by more traditional means such as the Southend Afternoon Echo.

News of this has hit many hard, with many people's belief in Ron Martin in particular badly hit. Whilst people come to terms with the scale of this, we ask you to think of this hardest hit. If you could spare some loose change, you could make a difference in the lives of those less well off than yourself.

What your money could buy:

£7.99 - buys a KFC bargain bucket to feed the malnourished Anthony Grant as he recovers from injury
£1.99 - would get some Werther's Orginals for Dougie Freedman to suck on whilst on the bench (300g pack, so should last for multiple games)
£5 (and upwards)- a proper footballer's haircut for Scott Spencer
£3.50 (approx) - a pint for Alan McCormack at Varsity/Mayhem etc to help ease the pain
Undisclosed (but quite possibly free) - Matthew Paterson 
£1 - a novelty comb for Adam Barrett to remind him of better times

Please give generously.

Donate now by clicking here

Green light for Blue Flag?

Colchester's Weston Care in the Community stadium has been nominated for a prestigious award.

The Third Division side's pitch was last night unveiled in front of the national TV cameras as amongst the finalists for this year's Blue Flag awards. The Blue Flag awards are handed out yearly to beaches that meet a strict quality control criteria.

As usual Colchester is lagging behind it's more illustrious neighbour in the south of the county, as a number of Southend beaches have already been awarded this honour, including the Three Shells beach, East Beach and Shoebury Common Beach.

It is hoped that the awarding of the internationally recognised honour will boost tourism in the north of the county, which has yet again seen disappointingly few people turn up this year to the newly opened beach. Even the addition of perennial seaside favourites, the donkeys - Clive Platt and Kayode Odejayi foremost amongst them - have failed to boost visitor numbers, with attendances in North Essex remaining embarrassingly low.

The sight of a blue flag fluttering above the stands would provide a big boost for Colchester fans deprived of entertainment and who, because of manager Aidy Boothroyd's hoof-ball tactics, already spend an inordinate amount of time starting up in the air.

The move is however not without controversy, as debate has ensued over whether the Care in the Community pitch is a beach, or as some critics claim a ploughed field. Others have claimed that the presence of so much rubbish in Tesco's carrier bags on the Weston Care in the Community pitch also make it unworthy of such an award.

Another day, another job: Tilson linked with move

The internet went into overdrive, again, today as Southend supremo Steve "Tilly" Tilson and assistant manager Paul Brush found themselves again being strongly linked with yet another vacant position in the latest in a long-running saga of unfounded speculation.

Tilson was strongly linked to another job back in November, as first reported by the Southend Afternoon Echo Sportsdesk.

Blues chiefs are yet to deny that they have received an official approach, but the Southend Afternoon Echo Sportsdesk understands that this could change if someone was to get in touch for talks, although the club would resist any such approach and Tilson himself might be reluctant to give up his job security at Roots Hall.

The speculation comes just hours after Lord Hanningfield quit as leader of Essex County Council after being charged with dishonestly submitting expenses claims. Tilson, with his outstanding managerial record, his strong Essex roots and as a life-long Blue could be a tempting choice as Essex County Council seek a new leader. Speculation is therefore mounting that Tilson could be tempted away from Roots Hall.

Said a source who has not spoken to either man about it: “Southend may have paid off the £2.1million to the tax man to avoid administration but their position is still precarious,” back in November, when he had not heard anything about the job speculation until we telephoned him. Another source stated: "He could be tempted, this makes more sense that half of the jobs he is linked with".

Appointing Tilson would however still be seen as controversial in parts of the county. Tilson led the chants of "One Team In Essex" when Southend United pipped their inbred neighbours to the League One title in 2005/06, a move that is unlikely to go down well with either Col Ewe fan. He and assistant manager Paul Brush, were also both members of the squad in 1989/90 that sent Col Ewe down to the Conference, a level Southend have never stooped as low as - a fact both Col Ewe fans should remember especially on Monday as the mighty Shrimpers visit the Care in the Community Stadium for the Essex derby.

Watt a signing: have Southend signed Benjani?

Southend United appear to have pulled off a stunning transfer coup with the loan signing of Man City's £7.6m Zimbabwean striker Benjani.

The club are refusing to name the player involved and are only stating that they are awaiting official confirmation that the transfer was lodged before the 5pm deadline and that the player would boost their striking options.

Sources are speculating that the FA employee with responsibility for looking after the fax machine nipped off home five minutes early on Monday night, leaving the fax machine to go into overdrive as the 5pm transfer deadline approached.

It is believed FA officials then had to spend all of Tuesday trying to sort through the paperwork which had by then spilled onto the floor leading to the pages of the faxed documents getting mixed up. The Southend Afternoon Echo Sportsdesk can exclusively reveal that it is believed that lowly League One Southend have signed Man City's multi-million pound international striker, whilst Premier League Sunderland had signed some 18 year old kid that no-one had heard of and is probably paid peanuts.

The move represents a real coup for the Essex side, although Sunderland must also be pretty chuffed to have got in Sanchez Watt a footballer with the most exotic name since Rio Alderton.

A product of the famed Arsenal English youth academy - and therefore following in the foot-steps of such legends as Kerrea Gilbert; Peggy Lokando; and the Black brothers, Michael and Tommy - Sunderland will be optimistic that Sanchez Watt can replicate Alderton's samba skills and maybe even rival Barrington Belgrave in the name stakes.

Police close case on missing man James Walker

A year on from the last positive sighting of missing man James Walker, police yesterday announced they were closing the case.

The Eddie Murphy look-a-like had been missing since January 2009, when he scored a stunning equaliser against rivals Leyton Orient.

Police however have now concluded that he'll wash up at Gillingham because all ex-Southend players seem to end up there or Wycombe - and Wycombe is further inland and they already have Harrold and Revell up front, with Betsy on the wing.

Police are however still looking for missing Essex business-man Geoff King, who was expected to deliver the eulogy, although no-one seems to be in a particular rush to find him.

January sales - end today!

The January sales are now in full flow and it is no different at Roots Hall when it comes to seasonal bargains for the New Year.

Our core of the side is up for sale, which includes Barnard, Francis and McCormack all with 50% of the RRP. That means you can buy our only source of goals, assists and bookings respectively.

If you need a goalscoring centre-forward then we have one available at the bargain basement price of £175,000- PLEASE NOTE THIS ITEM IS NOW SOLD OUT; a right-back/centre-half available to any interested Championship clubs (subject to personal terms) and if Millwall haven't finalised a deal already (although we'll deny that they've made a bid, despite previously having claimed otherwise), a fiery midfielder who finally looks as if he's interested again.

Don't forget, if you still have not had a chance to pick up the new Blues 2010 Calendar then do so today for an incredible £4!

With the winter weather causing havoc on the roads and last weekend's game which was nearly postponed, then why not take advantage of our online shop and let us deliver Dougie Freedman to your door.

The sale is available online, so why not check it out before all the bargains go to other League One clubs.

And remember with our special Ron Martin payment plan, you can buy today and only have to pay when the bailiffs come knocking!

New signing controversy latest

Southend's latest signing, Matt Paterson, found himself plunged into a controversy that could very well threaten his new club's future.

Paterson, was signed today on a free transfer from Southampton, to replace Lee Barnard who moved in the opposite direction for an undisclosed fee, believed to be in the region of £175,000.

The 20 year old forward was then quoted on the official site as saying "Tilly sold me the club".

However this remark has produced a furious response from Sainsburys, who claim that Steve Tilson couldn't possibly have sold him the club.

Sainsburys spokesman Jamie Oliver cited the November loan from the supermarket chain to a Martin Dawn group company, that was secured by Martin Dawn plc's shareholding in Southend United. The thick-lipped face of Sainsburys, went onto explain that this meant that the club wasn't Steve Tilson's to sell, because it was already mortgaged to the supermarket giant and Steve Tilson would have to "try something new today" to entice that centre-half that the club are supposedly also after.

CLUB STATEMENT: REVELL

Following the signing in January 2008 of Alex Revell for £150,000, the Club has since been unable to agree whether the sum paid is correct.

Southend were given just 36 hours notice of the transfer fee (which rose significantly from previous valuations, like when he signed for Brighton from Braintree). The Club (well, at least Geoff King) now believe they have overpaid by over £200,000 and have accordingly cancelled his contract by mutual consent. Wycombe were advised of this intention.

The Club offered to meet with Revell and his advisors to try and resolve the differences. This was at first rejected, but since then the parties have sat down and agreed to cancel his contract.

The Club solicitor wrote setting out the Club's position and so that supporters fully understand, the Club's solicitors wrote the following:

"We understand that Geoff King has written to supporters highlighting differences between the valuation for Alex Revell that Steve Tilson and the club originally had for Revell and the valuation the Geoff King now has for Revell. We now seek your cooperation with a review to trying to somehow reconcile these differences so that we don't keep paying a player* that we can't now play without Geoff King looking like a tit, even though the last time Revs was available Steve Tilson selected him.

(*assuming we of course are actually paying the players)

Our clients have also specifically drawn your attention in their letter a misallocation of £150,000 rising to £200,000. On the basis of this misallocation we are instructed that Alex Revell has no future at the club. Given that our clients have provided clear evidence of one misallocation on the part of Southend with respect to Kevin Betsy (who is to be allowed to join Wycombe on a free) we repeat our clients' request that Revell cooperates with SUFC with a view to reconciling their respective differences in what the remainder of his contract is worth. Our clients' Finance Director, Nigel Brunning, is willing to meet you or any other member of Team Revell in the first week of January 2010 for that purpose. Our client has specifically asked us to stress that they will pay any monies found to be due to Revell following the proposed meeting."

The Club's Chairman, Ron Martin, said:

"Southend United appear to be shedding squad players like confetti; clearly the club's relationship with its fringe players on large wages is not, in some quarters, a marriage made in heaven."

The Club will keep supporters informed and more particularly advise when the matter is finally closed.

http://www.southendunited.co.uk/page/NewsDetail/0,,10444~1932006,00.html

http://www.southendunited.co.uk/page/NewsDetail/0,,10444~1930173,00.html

Martin's Ambitious (Tax) Return

Southend United Chairman Ron Martin has urged Blues fans to boycott their taxes as he tries try to bring about his dream of a shiny new stadium.

All but a few of the final building blocks (although sadly still no literal ones) are in place for Southend to begin work on their new stadium this year.

However, it appears Her Majesty's Revenue and Customs is trying to stall the whole development and Martin is urging them to be less taxing on the league one side's cash-flow.

"Everybody has been working so hard to try and get the new development going it's frustrating that its being held up by the tax man expecting us to pay our tax" said Uncle Ron.

"As soon as the stadium gets going I will have the funds to really improve the squad and authorise the signings of more Alex Revells and Kevin Betsys (as maybe even pay our tax bill!) and then the future will start to look really bright.

"A real PAYE tax system would be one that I actually pay!" quipped Martin.


NEXT WEEK: Ron Martin calls for fans to boycott winter, as fixture cancellations stretch the Blues' cash-flow even further and threaten to delay the new stadium.

http://www.southendunited.co.uk/page/NewsDetail/0,,10444~1927211,00.html
http://www.southendunited.co.uk/page/NewsDetail/0,,10444~1932006,00.html

Team concerned with Freedman's fitness

Southend players say Dougie Freedman has been unable to train for nearly a year because of injury.

The team, who have scored six times this season, added that the enforced lay-offs could badly affect his performance.

The players told BBC London 94.9: "He's been without training for ages and that's a long time.

"Unless you're at a big club with a lot of facilities, like a time-machine, he can lose a lot of fitness."

They added: "He'll enjoy the first couple of days back but then he'll be itching to get back to bed.

"For one or two days of training, it's good, but then he'll start pulling his hamstring."

The younger players added that the lack of training could cause disruption to the former Crystal Palace's player form.

"When that routine gets broken, that's when his old man lifestyle takes over," they said.

"There are a lot of distractions out there. To keep a routine for an old man is very important."

But Freedman is in two minds when it comes to an enforced retirement, adding: "I think it would be welcomed by the players, but the fans are used seeing me out there, and I'm no different [other than being older and slower]. In that respect, I have to stay."

Source: BBC Sport

Revell-ed: the reason behind striker's return

Striker Alex Revell's Roots Hall return, has raised more than a few eye-brows, however the Southend Afternoon Echo can exclusively reveal the reasoning behind the home-coming of the man footballing super-pundit, Geoff King branded as having "failed to live up to expectations".

Whilst critics point to the fact that Revell's loan spell was up anyway and Swindon did not want to extend the loan of a player who had been an unused sub for their previous five matches, the Southend Afternoon Echo has learnt that the real reason was as part of an on-going dirty tricks battle.

Recent weeks have seen the escalation of the pizza war as Southend United supremo Ron Martin has sought to force out Super Pizza from their Victoria Avenue premises. The pizzeria is said to be the only thing standing between Southend United's way and Championship football in a state of the art stadium, and Ron Martin has appeared to be ever more desperate to force the issue.

This has necessitated the return of blogging striker Alex Revell, whose trademark finish involved culinary tips rather than a bulging net. Revell's recipes are now seen as a key ingredient in this on-going battle. By encouraging fans to cook for themselves instead of ordering take-away pizza it is hoped that Martin can drive the local business out of business, allowing Sainsburys to build a new supermarket on the Roots Hall site, which will in turn fund that tax bill just paid.

However Roots Hall insiders say the real test of the pudding for the Southend hierarchy's resolve will be whether onions are restored to the burgers in Roots Hall.

Revelling in it: "Geoff King has failed to live up to expectations"

Southend Chief Executive Geoffrey King should join the dole queue.

"Geoff King has failed to live up to expectations," Southend forward Alex Revell told the Southend Afternoon Echo Sportsdesk on his return from a loan spell with Swindon.

"He was appointed by the Football Club to deliver which he has not done and that is why he should be moving on.

"Others may fall into the same catagory (sic) as we move forwards and rebuild the finances and supposedly a new ground."

The controversial executive, who moved from Martin Dawn plc to South Eastern Leisure plc in 1998, has presided over a loss of nearly £2.5m in the last financial year.

Most damningly, he has still failed to resolve the onions in the burgers issues.

Dish of the week: King-sized humble pie

Rev's tip - Humble pie, is a form of revenge, so it's best served cold. Simply take a big bite and then keep your mouth shut, King.

Revell returns and Betsy's back as Blues' bosses back down

Kevin Betsy and Alex Revell are back at Roots Hall, in a move that will cause acute embarrassment to the Southend hierarchy.

The duo were controversially shipped out on loan in September to league one rivals Wycombe and Swindon respectively in a move that definitely wasn't about wages and Southend's impending financial crisis/winding up order, and was purely because they had underperformed. The move, first reported in All at Sea by Southend Afternoon Echo Sportsdesk's Phil Christophers, was dubbed Southend's Night of the Long Knives for the way it controversially wiped out all competition.

That lack of competition was to prove costly and helped contribute towards some particularly lacklustre showings over the festive period. The return of Revell and the competition he brings however, is hoped to sharpen Chairman Ron Martin's blogging efforts after those rambling efforts that offered little in the way of new information and bizarrely blamed the pizza man.

Meanwhile the Southend Afternoon Echo Sportsdesk can confirm that it will be publishing an Alex Revell exclusive: his first blog back; so watch this space!

2009 Christmas present review

Here at the Southend Afternoon Echo Sportsdesk we're nothing if not topical, so here's our run-down of last year's hottest Christmas stocking fillers:


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The Southend United Sat-Nav system

Tired of heading down blind allies like Damien Scannell? Looking as lost and out of place as Johnny Herd? Is your positioning all over the place like Simon Francis?

Then you need the celebratory endorsed Southend United Sat-Nav system with instructions barked out by Southend United Assistant Manager Paul Brush!

Says Southend United manager Steve Tilson about the Southend United Sat-Nav system: "like"!

RRP: £3,000
Our price: £2,999

Features include:

* The Alan McCormack pub finder
* The Ron Martin blog mode, for when you need a period of silence

Don't know where you want to go: simply choose the Francis Laurent random function!

Going abroad? Then simply upgrade to the Southend United Sat-Nav DELUXE model featuring Franck Moussa which will provide directions in French, Belgian Waffle and English.


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The Dougie Freedman Mobility Scooter

Tired of having trouble reaching that Alan McCormack misplaced pass?

Then you need the Dougie Freedman Mobility Scooter. This obsolete museum piece is guaranteed* to leave defenders in their wake. The Dougie Freedman Mobility Scooter comes with three speeds as standard: slow, slower and dummy it.

RRP: around £3,000 a week
Our price: FREE! (buyer must collect)

Says Southend United manager Steve Tilson: "like" and "I use it as much as I can."

Batteries not included.
Colours: Tommy Black or John White.


*Warning: Does not work in cold weather


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Southend United Novelty Calendar

Tired of not getting round to stuff and posting Christmas related pieces up in early January?

Then you need a Southend United themed squad calendar, featuring the entire squad and a different player for each month!

The perfect gift for any Southend United fan who wants to keep themselves organised from January (Adam Barrett) all the way through to October (Steve Parmenter)!

Featuring Ian Joyce as Mr February!!!

The perfect way for any fan to countdown the number of days left in the transfer window before Mr September (Lee Barnard) completes his move elsewhere!

Comes complete with tax return dates helpfully marked on to avoid those unnecessary train journeys up to the High Court.

RRP: £4.99
Our price: £7.99

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Sanfoka-Sudoku

Entertain the entire family with this new craze that is sweeping the country!

Simply try to figure out where Osei Sankofa fits into Steve Tilson's defence. The rules are straight forward as contestants simply have to perm the available defenders into a back four remembering that you can't play the same back four more than once! It's a lot harder than it looks, particularly when you've only got three fit defenders!!!

RRP: £200,000
Our price: free or on loan!!!

Comes complete with superfluous exclamation marks!!!


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All gifts are available from the Southend United gift shop on a buy now pay three years later basis. Ask inside for details.

Prices are either inclusive or exclusive of VAT, or at least would be if we if we paid any.
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Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year

First, and - continuing our commitment to put the late into latest news - the Southend Afternoon Echo Sportsdesk would like to thank both its readers for their continued support and wishes all Southend United fans a Happy New Year.

May your Christmas stockings have been as bulging as Ian Joyce's net was over the festive period.

Secondly, after a somewhat longer than intended Christmas break we're back, so watch this space......